So, sad news. Yesterday my good neighbour and friend, Ted, passed away. He's been ill as long as I knew him - the last two years - and he's also been consistently kind and decent no matter what.
First met him a few days before my son and I moved in, officially. The famous S and I were painting the living room, looked around, and there was a little old man painting the walls with us. "Hello," he said cheerfully. "I'm your next door neighbour."
He liked to garden - soon after I moved in, I woke up one morning, and he was out front, planting flowers along the borders in my front garden. He tried valiantly (and failed) to impart some of his knowledge to my son, but did succeed in teaching him how a lawnmower works. (Walk in straight lines, don't weave around like a drunken sailor.) When my mother-in-law was ill, I asked the famous S to keep an eye on Ted when I was away. I then asked Ted to keep an eye on S when I was away. This resulted in them cooking a meal together and sitting watching telly in Ted's living room - again, Ted valiantly tried to teach the FS the joys of football. Nothing doing. Did teach him snooker though, and they developed a mutual love for watching big trucks hauling across America and Canada, (particularly the ones travelling the iceroads) Warehouse Wars, and so on.
Sadly, he was financially abused by one of our other neighbours, to a shocking extent. (Basically she stripped him of his pension, 'borrowed' thousands of pounds, and sent him on weekly grocery runs for her and whatever animal is unfortunate enough to live with her.)
Some of you will will remember that she also caused me a lot of trouble earlier this year, when she started trying to blackmail me. Yes, pathetic really - she threatened to out me to our village church. (My girlfriend really, really doesn't want to be outed. Apparently the shock of it would scar her boys for life. I'm supposed to wait ten years until her youngest is eighteen.)
So, eventually, the lady now to be referred to as 'Nasty Neighbour' became so threatening and abusive that I had to take legal action to protect my son and I. (She had shown him pornographic pictures of herself, and then told people he was 'sexually confused' because his reaction was one of disgust rather than what she'd been expecting.) When I was in Manchester looking after my dying mother in law, she was texting me constantly, sending my son to the shop to get her electricity and gas, etc.
Once she sent after my son, that was it. I decided not to be blackmailed, and came out locally - to mixed reaction.(Most people really don't care. My erstwhile church are all praying for me) Didn't tell them who my girlfriend was (none of their business really.) Nasty Neighbour at that point started threatening suicide, threatening to kill her dog by injecting him with Ted's insulin, banging on my door and texting me on a regular basis, asking for money, or my prescription medication, repeating either that she would kill herself if I didn't comply, that I was abusing her, or that she was going to set my garden on fire. I texted her politely asking her to desist, followed by a barrage of hate mail. Which was actually a good thing, because it provided evidence in court, and she was slapped with both an injunction and a PIN, forbidding her to approach or communicate with my son and I, or to send any of her associates on her behalf.
Unfortunately she got legal aid, turned up in court saying it had all been a terrible misunderstanding, that her mental health would suffer irreparably if she was burdened with an injunction. So, the injunction got swapped over to a 'Promise of Good Behaviour,' with a duration of only three months. (If she broke her promise to the court it was still an arrestable offence.)
Anyway, she's been trying to stretch the terms of her PIN ever since - Famous S and I have continued to blank her.
As soon as I heard that Ted died, I knew in my gut that she'd use it as an excuse to try to approach us. My gut was right. Last night included banging on our front door. When we slammed it in her face there was a little bit of shouting. Then she sent around one of her boyfriends. Then she sent me abusive texts, including one telling me that neither S nor I are welcome at Ted's funeral, that we're petty, pathetic, that everyone knows about our 'disgusting display' (I think she means me shutting my own front door without a word and turning the key.)
Obviously, the police have been informed.
What is sad is that she has obviously got away with this kind of behaviour before. In Ted's case, toward the end of his life he was frightened to be seen talking to me in public places. We'd chat over the back fence, but I couldn't have a cup of tea in his living room anymore, because she had a tendency to storm in and start yelling at him if she thought he was talking to her 'enemies.' (Of whom I am obviously Maniacal Enemy Number One. I mean, seriously? Who has mortal enemies in real life? Besides me, apparently.)
Ted was a lovely old man, and I'm sad to have lost his company, but glad that he is out of the debilitating and constant struggle he had with his blood pressure, heart and diabetes. I'm glad that he's no longer forking over most of his pension money to this woman, I'm glad that he's in a better place. Or, if my religious theories are wrong, and the soul doesn't survive, then still - he's out of pain, and no longer being bullied.
Anyway - obviously I can't go to her funeral. Ted's been dead less than 24 hours, and she's already making the whole thing into a soap opera. As my son says, 'it doesn't matter Mum, we don't have to go. Ted won't be there, after all.'
Just - a sad end to the week. He had been looking forward to meeting![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ride again in a few months (he wanted to see your reaction to the Scottish blue potatoes in my garden, and had made some slow gin a few years ago he thought you might like.)
And sorry for the long and rather gratuitous self-pity post, and any typos herein. It's been a long and horrible year for the most part, with certain exceptions. (dS con for the win!)
Guess I needed to get it off my chest.
Okay, now I'm going to breathe.
First met him a few days before my son and I moved in, officially. The famous S and I were painting the living room, looked around, and there was a little old man painting the walls with us. "Hello," he said cheerfully. "I'm your next door neighbour."
He liked to garden - soon after I moved in, I woke up one morning, and he was out front, planting flowers along the borders in my front garden. He tried valiantly (and failed) to impart some of his knowledge to my son, but did succeed in teaching him how a lawnmower works. (Walk in straight lines, don't weave around like a drunken sailor.) When my mother-in-law was ill, I asked the famous S to keep an eye on Ted when I was away. I then asked Ted to keep an eye on S when I was away. This resulted in them cooking a meal together and sitting watching telly in Ted's living room - again, Ted valiantly tried to teach the FS the joys of football. Nothing doing. Did teach him snooker though, and they developed a mutual love for watching big trucks hauling across America and Canada, (particularly the ones travelling the iceroads) Warehouse Wars, and so on.
Sadly, he was financially abused by one of our other neighbours, to a shocking extent. (Basically she stripped him of his pension, 'borrowed' thousands of pounds, and sent him on weekly grocery runs for her and whatever animal is unfortunate enough to live with her.)
Some of you will will remember that she also caused me a lot of trouble earlier this year, when she started trying to blackmail me. Yes, pathetic really - she threatened to out me to our village church. (My girlfriend really, really doesn't want to be outed. Apparently the shock of it would scar her boys for life. I'm supposed to wait ten years until her youngest is eighteen.)
So, eventually, the lady now to be referred to as 'Nasty Neighbour' became so threatening and abusive that I had to take legal action to protect my son and I. (She had shown him pornographic pictures of herself, and then told people he was 'sexually confused' because his reaction was one of disgust rather than what she'd been expecting.) When I was in Manchester looking after my dying mother in law, she was texting me constantly, sending my son to the shop to get her electricity and gas, etc.
Once she sent after my son, that was it. I decided not to be blackmailed, and came out locally - to mixed reaction.(Most people really don't care. My erstwhile church are all praying for me) Didn't tell them who my girlfriend was (none of their business really.) Nasty Neighbour at that point started threatening suicide, threatening to kill her dog by injecting him with Ted's insulin, banging on my door and texting me on a regular basis, asking for money, or my prescription medication, repeating either that she would kill herself if I didn't comply, that I was abusing her, or that she was going to set my garden on fire. I texted her politely asking her to desist, followed by a barrage of hate mail. Which was actually a good thing, because it provided evidence in court, and she was slapped with both an injunction and a PIN, forbidding her to approach or communicate with my son and I, or to send any of her associates on her behalf.
Unfortunately she got legal aid, turned up in court saying it had all been a terrible misunderstanding, that her mental health would suffer irreparably if she was burdened with an injunction. So, the injunction got swapped over to a 'Promise of Good Behaviour,' with a duration of only three months. (If she broke her promise to the court it was still an arrestable offence.)
Anyway, she's been trying to stretch the terms of her PIN ever since - Famous S and I have continued to blank her.
As soon as I heard that Ted died, I knew in my gut that she'd use it as an excuse to try to approach us. My gut was right. Last night included banging on our front door. When we slammed it in her face there was a little bit of shouting. Then she sent around one of her boyfriends. Then she sent me abusive texts, including one telling me that neither S nor I are welcome at Ted's funeral, that we're petty, pathetic, that everyone knows about our 'disgusting display' (I think she means me shutting my own front door without a word and turning the key.)
Obviously, the police have been informed.
What is sad is that she has obviously got away with this kind of behaviour before. In Ted's case, toward the end of his life he was frightened to be seen talking to me in public places. We'd chat over the back fence, but I couldn't have a cup of tea in his living room anymore, because she had a tendency to storm in and start yelling at him if she thought he was talking to her 'enemies.' (Of whom I am obviously Maniacal Enemy Number One. I mean, seriously? Who has mortal enemies in real life? Besides me, apparently.)
Ted was a lovely old man, and I'm sad to have lost his company, but glad that he is out of the debilitating and constant struggle he had with his blood pressure, heart and diabetes. I'm glad that he's no longer forking over most of his pension money to this woman, I'm glad that he's in a better place. Or, if my religious theories are wrong, and the soul doesn't survive, then still - he's out of pain, and no longer being bullied.
Anyway - obviously I can't go to her funeral. Ted's been dead less than 24 hours, and she's already making the whole thing into a soap opera. As my son says, 'it doesn't matter Mum, we don't have to go. Ted won't be there, after all.'
Just - a sad end to the week. He had been looking forward to meeting
ride again in a few months (he wanted to see your reaction to the Scottish blue potatoes in my garden, and had made some slow gin a few years ago he thought you might like.)And sorry for the long and rather gratuitous self-pity post, and any typos herein. It's been a long and horrible year for the most part, with certain exceptions. (dS con for the win!)
Guess I needed to get it off my chest.
Okay, now I'm going to breathe.
